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Divorce Mistakes | 5 Mistakes to Avoid During a Divorce


Going through a split is difficult in any circumstance, but getting a divorce seems especially painful. Someone you thought you would spend your entire life with is suddenly not a good fit.

Whether it was your idea or your spouse decided on the separation, it’s important to protect yourself legally and otherwise. Here are Five Mistakes you definitely want to avoid as you go through this process.

Working with a family law attorney is a vital part of avoiding these mistakes. Be sure to have a professional in your corner.

1. Letting Your Emotions Call the Shots

There’s no doubt that going through a divorce is extremely emotional. However, it’s very easy to make bad decisions when you let your emotions take the reins.

Fortunately, there are steps you can take to process your emotions before you make important decisions. These include pausing to understand your emotions, taking your time, asking yourself questions, and getting an outside opinion.

If you don’t realize that your emotions are hijacking you, though, you won’t know the importance of taking these steps. So make sure you’re aware of your decision making during this difficult time.

2. Making Moves Specifically to Hurt Your Spouse

Your spouse wants a divorce, so you may want to get back at them by removing them from insurance, health coverage, and other policies. Don’t do it! 

Avoid the desire to get revenge in ways that are aimed at hurting your spouse. If something happens you could be found liable for charges and expenses. There are certain policies that can only be activated during specific times of year, so you could have to pay for this mistake a long time.

It’s common to be angry, but don’t lash out. It only causes more problems.

3. Fighting Over Cheap Property

Arguments during a divorce can cost thousands of dollars in lawyer fees, no matter how minor the issue is. Think about that and save those disputes for things that really matter! 

If you’re arguing about something that costs $20, or even $200? Save money on attorney fees and buy yourself another one. Save the serious legal issues for things that matter, like child custody, child support, alimony, your home, or other major valuables.

4. Disappearing With the Kids

If you’re in a custody dispute, it is quite tempting to simply take the kids and go. After all, they are your kids, so you can’t get in trouble, right?


Taking the kids and disappearing – even if you contact your spouse later with your address – can only hurt your case during a custody discussion. You need to control your emotions, be as rational and respectful as possible, and make your best case to the judge.

If you can be described as “kidnapping” the kids or trying to keep your spouse away, the judge is less likely to trust you with full custody or a strong visitation schedule.

5. Failing to Work With a Strong Divorce Lawyer

Not having someone who is an advocate for you is a huge mistake. Having a strong divorce lawyer on your side can help you avoid the mistakes listed above and many others. In fact, your lawyer can be a sounding board to help you make wise decisions throughout the process.

If you are facing a split and need someone to represent you, White Oak Legal is here to help. Contact us at White Oak Law Offices. Or call us (919)-680-1310 for a consultation today. You’ll be glad you did.

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